One of my fave writers once said, "You know, when you first start writing you're going to suck. And so it's good to keep it to yourself, until maybe you don't suck as much." And, holy balls, do I hear that—too my very core, a phrase, by the way, I just learned originated from 14th-century … Continue reading Flesh out the Suck
When I was a kid, my Dad was a smuggler. Every Saturday morning, he would prep his Cessna 172 Skyhawk and take to the skies, hopping the border into the US from where we lived in British Columbia to scoop up his bootleg stash. The quick 45-minute trek landed him in small town Pac NW … Continue reading The Family Smuggler
Before we go further, I'd like to address the ugly, orange elephant in the room. This entry is not about DJT. Not at all. It just pisses me off that one of the most vile people on the planet stole one of the coolest words- especially given the asshole's name is actually Drumpf. And there's … Continue reading The Trump of Tropes: The One
I'll say upfront that I'm healthy as a horse, depending on the horse, and also what a weird saying that is, anyway. That is to say that I'm all good, and according to my recent bloodwork, even better than that. Short the pending results from my boob smashing session as well as the upcoming tube-up-the-pooper, … Continue reading Death Becomes Her
If Michael's craft store was any indicator, every holiday post the fourth of July began at that very time. Commercialism abound, once the American flag was outsold or packed away? You could be sure a cornucopia filled with summer squash could be found as easily as a glow-in-the-dark skeleton or a floppy red Santa hat. … Continue reading Happy Hallothanksmas!
A few days ago, Riley, the rambunctious ten-year-old girl who lives next door, while playing at our house, came to stand at the open door of my bedroom. Her eyes wide, she asked me, as I sat at my makeup vanity readying myself for work, if the room was mine. When I told her yes, … Continue reading Unapologetically Immature
Happy belated manufactured love day. My brain, which is as often as not in complete incoherence with my heart, basically gives the finger to the fake holiday. My heart, meanwhile, seems to give no shits, although maybe it would matter if I had an other in my life. Either way, their handshake solidarity is shaky, … Continue reading Da Brain. Duh, Heart.
My mother taught me to treat everyone with kindness. She was adamant that the guy pumping the gas was as valuable as the guy sitting in the boardroom. Buuuuut, as is human nature, her judgment was still there - however small - and she once referred to Nicolas Cage as the "greasy gas station attendant … Continue reading Socrates is my Homeboy
Today, as I sat in the sun in my capri-length linen pants - my white legs giving my PNW background away - I bent to lather my lizardy stems with a bit of moisture. As I did, I noticed the long hair that I was certain was so light as to be invisible. Wrong. Earlier … Continue reading A Shameless Overshare
It’s been just over two weeks since I landed in San Diego, and I’m so grateful to have a space to stay with a pretty rad bestie as I figure out my life. We’ve had fun - staying up late, cooking delicious meals, and laughing like a couple of teenagers. And in all of this, … Continue reading Sittin’ Pretty… or Sittin’, Anyway
